The Least You Can Say

It's a great little weapon,

That tongue in your head;

And you take it wherever you go;

Yes, I'm sure you'll agree

It's a weapon to dread

When you use it for lashing a foe.

You can wound with a phrase

Or cut deep with a word

Its a smoke-screen of innocent jest;

But the truth of it is,

Or -- well, so I have heard,

That the least you can say is the best.

It's a weapon for gossiping

All through the day

Or at night in the tattler's club,

When the free-for-all wagging

Has infinite play

And wild rumor is worn to the nub.

It's a marvelous thing

How some word you let fall

Can ruin a man.  But please rest

Quite assured, my dear friend,

If you must speak at all,

That the least you can say is the best.

It's a great little weapon

For sarcasm, too,

The sly tongue that you hold in your cheek;

You can cut men to pieces

Or run them quite through

With an ironic word you can speak.

What a weapon it is

For dethroning a man

From his fine self-esteem -- but I'm blessed,

That I firmly believe --

Ah, deny it who can!

That the least you can say is the best!

(Copyright, 1940)